So I see now how I relate to that little girl. My coping mechanism for difficult times is to become superficial, this is where I lose my connection to Christ and thus creating a downward spiral. How else do we come to victory, but to lay ourselves down and pick up the cross? I'm sorry, but picking up that cross cannot be done superficially. I cannot allow this any further, but after so many years of this being my m.o., how do I not revert back to it? This I will have to ponder. Ciao for now!